Welcome to the #BeReal series!
I want to showcase real people. You will judge them. That’s okay. And it will be natural for you to do that. To read all the #BeReal posts to date you can click HERE.
I put together this series because teens everywhere are jumping on this #DontJudgeMe bandwagon. Well, I think the trend needs some context. The hashtag #DontJudgeMe seemed to come from nowhere. But it spread like wildfire, and was used millions of times in a very short period of time! If you don’t know what I am talking about, just Google “#DontJudgeMe” and you will see thousands of teens making #DontJudgeMe videos. You can read more about what I think of the challenge HERE.
We live in a kaleidoscope world where we’re all different. We are living art. Being viewed and critiqued by those around us. We are quickly assessed and categorized. We are judged by everyone we meet. That’s how we work. It’s part of living in a society with other people. Our brains make snap judgments in order to survive. So we can protect ourselves, or know when it’s safe to let our guards down a little. We judge people before we even realize we have seen or heard them. We judge books by their covers. It’s what we do.
What is #BeReal?
Not everyone will agree on what it means to be real. The great thing is that we’re all individuals with our own thoughts and feelings. So to kick off this series, I will go first. Here’s what I think being real means:
If I could pick only one image for you to judge, it would be this one. This picture tells you the story of who I most want to be. I hope you see a happy person who loves to make people laugh. But chances are, your own experiences told you a different story about the girl in this picture. Even though our brains judge their surroundings using templates and defaults, we also have the ability to judge further. We can dig deeper. Find the truth underneath the assumptions our brain makes.
This morning, I was driving out of my neighborhood when several baby ducks suddenly darted into the street. Right in front of my car. I stopped and watched them, while they SLOWLY dawdled across the street. Once they were clear of the road, I drove on. I noticed an elderly neighbor walking around a lake path. He was easy to spot, because his hands were held high. He was clapping, and he had a huge smile on his face, cheering for what he felt was my compassion.
This man made my heart feel joy. And in the span of only a few seconds, I judged him to be good and beautiful. That is the kind of real I want to be. I want to move people beyond my image. I want to show people something more meaningful.
If you were to ask me who I think the real me is, I would tell you I am… searching.
I am a combination of everything I’ve done and the decisions I have made. If you read my blog, you probably have a good sense of who I am as a person. I have mental illness, so not all my realness is positive. But, because I have friends who dig deeper and know more about who I am, I have become brave enough to share parts of me that aren’t all that pretty. Why? Because by doing that, I can help other people become brave enough to be themselves. And there is beauty in that.
The real problem isn’t that we judge each other. It’s that we don’t take the time to judge with compassion and love. If we practice being more compassionate, we can learn to dig deeper. Then we can override the quick assumptions we make about others. If we can do that as a society, we will see more people being comfortable in their own skin. And then we can all do things which are more productive than worrying about the images we project.
WHAT DOES BEING REAL MEAN TO YOU?
If you want to be part of the #BeReal series then email your post, your picture, permission to use your name, and a bio with all the links you want to promote to: firstname.lastname@example.org No rules, No deadline… I want to include your voice.
If you like the idea of the #BeReal series, and want to share your views on it, please link up with us. You can help make this a bigger, brighter movement than it already is.
All opinions welcome – it’s about being real, after all!
To help spread the message, read and share one another’s posts.
And remember – be YOU! #BeReal.
Hastywords is an anxiety driven over-analyzer. With a mind full of rainbows and devils she began giving her thoughts a way out of her head by writing poetry. Writing began as therapy for her depression and helped her gain perspective by putting her tears and laughter into words!
She uses the money she makes on her books to support other writers. Purchase her books, The Darker Side of Night and Depression’s Dance, here.
Darker Side of Night – Modern day poetry from the shadowy corners of an overactive imagination. Whether we embrace the night or we fear it, one thing is for certain: almost anything can be hiding in the dark. Take a peek at what is hiding in wait.
“I found this extremely raw and emotional and at times even haunting. The writer has no shame or hesitation in sharing her vulnerability with the reader. It’s endearing and inspiring. Loved it all. A must read!~ Anthony Ortalano”
Depression’s Dance – Depression has a way of sneaking into your life and before you know it you are caught in a dance you can’t cut away from. This is about my dance with depression complete with the moments of desperation as well as the moments of hope.
“In Depression’s Dance, depression is also given a voice, “I have convinced you to believe you are broken beyond repair.” It speaks throughout the book as an enchanter, luring Hasty to walk away from those she loves, from her desires and things that make her happy, and essentially her life. Hasty skilfully creates the voice as if it is spoken just under the surface of the conscious, sensed, but unheard. It implants negative perceptions and sabotages the ability to dispel them. While depression is an underlying influence which aims to destroy her, Hasty’s own voice is shared through her poetry. ~Sage Doyle”