THE SINS OF TRAUMA

There are lots of things I hate About trauma Real honest to goodness trauma Like… How it automatically steals Future joy How it cripples effective communication How it makes trenches With one way signs in brains How it dictates patterns Of protection Of avoidance Of self-sabotage Of self- destruction Of hyper-vigilance How it demands boundaries…

UNFOCUSED

The days are too short The minutes too few I wasted so many already On hurt feelings On tears of surrender On disliking myself On anger and frustration On wishes and hopes On sleep… on avoidance On escapism and heartache Precious golden seconds Carelessly spent On too many of the wrong Small things And not…

SPRING MIX

Green leaves sit Vibrate and valuable Huddled together Inside plastic Waiting They did their job They grew big Got picked And packaged And ended up In my fridge Where good intentions For health and happiness Wilt slowly Eight dollars and change Each week Wasted on Not following through

DO YOU LOVE ME?

Everyday For years and years He tells me I am beautiful That he loves me And I believe him Because he’s honest And yet… Some days I need to ask “Do you love me?” And it must be exhausting To reestablish the established To re-utter the uttered To have to tear down walls That have…

IT TAKES TWO

I was thinking about how much I try to be a good person. Foster good intentions. But I’ve been the villain too. I’m not perfect and I do mean things whether intentional or not. Eminem “Big Weenie” just started its lyrical foray in my head. Give me a sec’. Gotta shut that down dead. Ok……

FRACTIONS

There are fractions of me Scattered all over the floor And I feel like if I knew math I’d be able to solve them Puzzle them out for good Once and for all And I’d be a whole… finally Like all of you

NO MORE WORDS

The noon sun peaks around clouds And paints my wrinkled face softly As I sit on a tractor in the middle of a field Engine off, the wind questions me in whispers This morning was hard I softly mumble But the wind carried my words away Dried mud clings like armor to my skin The…

AN OLDER ME

I want things I’ve never wanted Or didn’t know I did Peaceful days Patient people Comfortable friends Content nights Warm arms to Fall asleep in Strong arms to Support my failings The dreams I had Died with youth My older heart Just wants to rest And feel loved

GOLDEN VOICE OF SILENCE

Silence sits on the sideline As the universe passes by Millions of stars crying blue Pleading to a heavy moon And shadows on bended knee Praying to their own deity And when the whispering ends And all the great things say goodbye Silence will stand with back straight And use its very golden voice To…

SALTWATER FALLS

A mind Full of stones Emotion Like water flows From feelings To a heart Like a waterfall A whole life lived Underwater Until tears Drain the sea Leaving Only pieces Of bone As evidence That every Last thing Was felt