My #BeReal guest today is Thelma Thomas.
This piece was submitted several weeks ago and since then Thelma’s son has died of a heroin overdose. Please give her your love and support.
The Mouthy Mermaid Talks About Addiction, How Did I Get Here?
First of all Hasty, thank you for inviting me to write an article about my life. I never saw myself as a writer before and I like it. I don’t know if I am doing it correctly but I am getting readers, making friends and having fun. So today…..Thelma Thomas, The Mouthy Mermaid is going to talk about addiction.
I started life as a nice Catholic School educated young woman in the 60’s and graduated HS in the early 70’s. Ladies in my era were raised to go to college and find a nice husband to take care of them, right?
Well, I found a husband that I had to take care of ……Why, because he was an alcoholic, that’s why. I didn’t get it for years because of course I thought this behavior was perfectly NORMAL. Yes, dear friends , it’s perfectly normal to drink a 12 pack every day, it’s perfectly normal to argue with my mother who lived with us about who drank all the beer, because of course she was an alcoholic too. It’s perfectly normal for both of his parents to die from alcohol related illnesses, NORMAL, RIGHT???
The head blew off 27 years later when he was so drunk he couldn’t get out of the pool and all I could see was me holding his head under the water. Hmmmm, I walked to a Circle K and had a brain flash and used the payphone and called something called Al anon and some nice lady came and picked me up and took me to a meeting. Finally dear friends, I got it. I got all of it about being a Codependent. I call us Co’s. BTW, I went to meetings for years.
A few years later, he never was able to get it together and we divorced and it was long, drawn out and nasty. Mom passed away, his brother died of an overdose and on and on and on.
So now……My Dear Son has this illness of course because I totally believe it is a genetic illness. My addiction is to them, not substances. I learned that in Al anon.
The daily killing of a beautiful young man at age 33 is about killing his mother. This man, my Dear Son or my Dear Addict, has been in jail, treatment x2 and on and on and on. His lovely wife, Little Miss is codependent, they met in high school, she has no idea how to get help nor will she as I have offered many avenues. I am so scared for my Dear Son. When addiction hits your loved ones and your family what’s the answer. In his world, I pray, offer to take him to AA, and usually stay out of it. I detach as I learned in Al anon.
Drugs, heroin and pills are killing the youth in this country and no one gives a big fat shit. The epidemic is so large no one knows what to do. Me: I would like to put drug dealers in jail. I am hurt, sad, angry, depressed and don’t even know what else.
Addiction kills the addict and their loved ones. Right now it’s killing me and my addict can’t even care. Thank God I have a good support circle of GF’s and my man.
Does anyone have any ideas on this topic?
I am a 59 years young lady rocking life, with the ups and downs. I live in a happy place in the ocean, I love and collect Mermaids because they are a mythical being. I swim through the MURK every day and love life.
You can find me at www.themouthymermaid.com where my mermaid friends discuss everything and put it right out there.
You can find me on Facebook @ Thelma Thomas, The Mouthy Mermaid.