Do you ever feel like you have a million things to say to a hundred different people but you don’t because you are afraid they won’t hear you? They won’t care? They won’t understand?
We are becoming words on a screen. Body language is being left out.
I can say I need help but you can’t see the tears in my eyes. The way my nails dig into my skin. How my smile no longer exists. You can’t see the way I have locked myself inside my “to do” list to avoid real faces lost inside the light of their phones. You don’t see the moments I spend on my bathroom floor just crying. You can’t hear my desperation, or the way I pull at my hair. We are just words on a screen that say,
I can say life is beautiful but you can’t see the way my eyes are lit up. The way my smile lives on my face or how my walking pace is just a little bit perkier than yesterday. We are just words on a screen that say,
Our voices are becoming whispers in an ocean of issues continually threatening to drown us all in a big nasty tidal wave. Our physical being is becoming nonexistent, we are becoming robots hardwired to useless information.
The world is a crazy mess of a place and just once I want to wake up in a musical where I am singing! I want THAT world and I want to sound so brilliant that everyone around me will forget they are lost inside a text message for a few moments and just sing along with me.
I want to feel present in a world that I would feel passionate enough to sing about.
Somewhere there are shadows that I’ve left
Those moments of blue that faded into black
All dancing in the spaces just beyond; gone
The place where every tear becomes a song
I don’t have time to say what is on my mind
I am racing every second until the day is done
But I care about you, the whole collective you
I care about all the little things that you do
I am too busy though, racing around this clock
On a worn path that hasn’t been paved in awhile
So I won’t tell you today that I need a smile
Or talk about all the things we both find vile
I’ve forgotten what the sunrise and sunset feel like
I see them paint the sky every morning, every night
But I used to sit with them and feel the earth spin
I used to hear how they sounded, feel them on my skin
Now in order to connect I have to push send
I miss the body language that comes with “I love you”
I miss the times where friendships didn’t feel ghostly
Disembodied loved ones dancing became our poetry