YESTERDAY’S ALTER

When finally, finally I had opened my eyes I could feel the spiders scurry from their webs And cockroaches who had thought me dead Scuttled frantically from under my bones I felt like a pile of sawdust waiting for the wind To come along and sweep me into a hurricane Back into the chaos from…

LIVING IS A CHOICE

Living is a choice Every single time And it’s been awhile Since I imagined death I wanted to know How the water would feel If I breathed it in I’ve heard it hurts But only for a moment And then I wondered If it would matter If it would hurt anyone And I couldn’t imagine…

WE ARE GOLD

So often I think about how connected we should all be. Not like the The Borg in Star Trek with it’s hive mind or anything but maybe more like a hive soul. It feels like when we let one child down we are letting all of humanity down. When we turn away a person in…

THE OTHER TERROR

I remember reading the passage below when I was suffering from depression and thinking how perfectly it described how I felt in the darkest moment of my life. There are terrors you can’t see. I didn’t understand depression until I had it. I had to come face to face with that unseen terror. And it’s…

WHEN PEOPLE LEAVE

People you love will leave It’ll hurt and you’ll cry Your brain will have A million things to say You’ll blame yourself Wish you could have done better Wish you could have changed Wonder what you could have done But babe If you loved them and you tried If you were there for them If…

NOT SILENT

Silence has a sound If you listen Does it sound like peace Quiet breathing Content thoughts Kind memories Your own heartbeat Or is it loud Electrical humming Chaos echoing A chorus of voices That sound like you? Berating you? Scolding you? Questioning you? And then answering you? Internal silence doesn’t exist And sometimes it asks…

INVISIBLE

It’s hard to explain The nature of things That are invisible Science tries to With measurements With observations Sampling reality By constricting By eliminating Trying to find The reason The basis The foundation That makes An invisible thing True or false But sometimes The invisible thing Is just invisible It doesn’t exist In the place…

YET AGAIN

It’s a fight. Sometimes I freeze Watch the storm come Glued to my spot I know what it brings I know it’s bigger I know it’s stronger I know it’s dark And menacing And that I should run I know too It was inevitable That it would Come back for me And yet I’m frozen…