I LOVE YOU…YOU SUCK

Everything Changes

Walking down the street, you encounter a folded piece of paper on the sidewalk. You pick it up and read it and immediately, your life has changed. Describe this experience.


The sky was a piercing sword grey and threatened to burst into tears at any moment.  The weather likes to mimic me and my mood was dark when I happened upon a piece of paper.  I opened it and it healed me.  It said GOODBYE!  When people don’t say goodbye the silence screams,

“YOU ARE NOT WORTH THAT ONE SIMPLE WORD”

There are lots of reasons to take a break from someone but, in my opinion, there is no excuse for simply disappearing. Well unless you have a stalker and you fear for your life and then I think it is probably ok… cause… scary.

I can’t imagine this happens in real life. People don’t just hang out with you, care about you, love you and WHAM disappear.

Do they??

OF COURSE THEY DO! It happens all the time. Think back to all those people who just kind of left without an explanation. I think everyone is probably guilty of it but it hurts when it happens whether the person it happens to admits it or not. Shame on you, on me, for being this socially careless.

I had a friend once say, “That is their prerogative”. Never had truer words been said. Well maybe lots of truer things have been said but, in that moment, it was the hard truth.

But here is what I don’t get… why?

A truth: I share too much and I need to learn who can handle it and who can’t. I should change this about myself…or I guess I should just get used to people treating me like a monster and running away screaming without goodbye! BOO!

Another truth: people have a hard time stepping into other peoples shoes…no matter how much they themselves get judged they will in turn judge others just as harshly once their values are stepped on. If this happens goodbye is the most respectful answer.

This poem is a bit sarcastic…it was too hard to be serious because…well…it just was…take my word for it…because you don’t have any other choice than to believe me….cause…I’m the Author.  This is what I imagine those who disappear are REALLY saying… THIS is what the silence screams at me.

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I love you but you suck

I’m sorry for this, truly

But you’re too toxic

And not worth my time

I hate seeing you hurt

Because it hurts me too

So here, let me disappear

It will be better this way

For me more than you

But life is brutal, it’s true

Thanks for the memories

For the moments of love

Thanks for the sacrifice

Of your precious time

I’ll never forget you

Just remember I love you

BUT YOU TOTALLY SUCK

 

 

42 thoughts on “I LOVE YOU…YOU SUCK

  1. If “sharing too much” is who you are, you are being true to yourself when you continue to do so. It’s one thing to slowly open yourself up to new people and another to stop being yourself so that people won’t leave you. I would rather have a couple of close friends (which is about what I have) then a lot of “fake” ones. But then, I’m an introvert. And people you care about just disappearing does suck.

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  2. If they disappear, I think it’s not that you suck, it’s that they do. They can’t cope, are only in it for what they get, not what they give back. I agree with Dan above, who has time to waste on fakes? On people who won’t be there when you really need them. We all have tough times, and our true friends are the ones who don’t disappear. It does hurt a lot, though. It sucks.

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  3. I don’t get the disappearing thing either. I think people who do that are complete cowards. I knew a guy who told his wife he was going out for cigarettes and never came back. How could you do that knowing she’s going to worry you’re dead in a ditch somewhere?

    However, if it wasn’t serious – like after 2-3 dates, that’s not as big a deal. I kind of did that to someone who was extremely clingy because every time I tried to break it off, he argued with me about why it wasn’t working. And we’d only been going out for 2 weeks., He ended up stalking me after I stopped returning his calls, but he KNEW that I’d met someone else. I was very honest in that respect.

    On the flip side. I got dumped via email (1st and only break-up via email) for a younger woman – 2 hours before THE WEEKEND. You know, when I assumed we’d be shacking up for the first time. And I’d just gotten back from driving 200 miles to drop my boys off at my mother’s in order to go away with this guy. However, though he was a JACK ASS, at least he was honest and didn’t leave me hanging! And, LOL, he called me 6 months later wanting another chance, but it was too late. I’d already met Charlie, my husband of 13 years. So, Karma bit him in the ass, but again, at least he didn’t disappear.

    Anywho…LOVE the poem and the post. Perhaps, after reading this, someone will think TWICE about walking away without a word.
    Best,
    TB

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    • I’ve really been reflecting on this a lot lol. Goodbye I hate you is better than just completely ignoring you. It really is very very weird and in my case it isn’t boyfriends. You didn’t disappear you tried to say goodbye lol.

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  4. I have to say, I’m guilty of just disappearing on people. I don’t like confrontation and when I’m fed up, I’m fed up. But you’re absolutely right it’s not fair to walk away without even saying goodbye, or even just saying why. I’m sure it had a lot to do with insecurities about being left first, so I just end whatever it is without a word. Still it isn’t and wasn’t right. No excuses.

    We can only be who we are, the minute someone tries to change that is the minute we should wake up and say, “This is me, if you don’t like it, well it’s been real, but the door is over there.” The notion of being alone shouldn’t have any bearings on our personality. However, it truly does.

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  6. People are selfish f**kers who only care about themselves. I want to send that little poem to my douchy ex-boyfriend lol.

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  7. You are so right. That feeling of being left hanging is awful. Saying goodbye is hard but recently did, mainly for myself but maybe also for the other person. It helps if you really mean it though.

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  13. wait… why did this appear in Twitter but not my reader? Am I being a moron? Also, calm down. People who type to you don’t necessarily love you. No, they have no right to make you feel close to them and then just leave. But you can’t let yourself be so open to hurt that you take it this personally. I mean, I feel your pain. This happens all the time. But relationships here are not the same as the real world. I have had one guy that I really respected turn out to be a sneaky slimy perve… and I have been hearing rumors about someone else who has the same type of loyal following… lots of women who idolize him… who might not be the same person in private as they are when they can get into your private comment box.
    You have to keep one thing in mind. This is all, in a way, like a big dating sight. People put their best face forward. People exaggerate. People want to be liked. But just like in a dating sight, all the guys aren’t 6 feet or more tall and ripped surfer fireman who rescue puppies and read to blind grandmothers.
    The thing is that this is a different level of investment than meeting in real life. You can’t see the flaws. The shifty eyes, the signs that something might not be right. And even if life some of the most dangerous and toxic people are smooth and can hide in plain sight. You can’t let people fill a void here that you will be devastated when they leave. Because a fair number of them will. They will get bored, or busy, or find out that you don’t have what they need, what they were trying to get from you. It is easy to leave someone electronically. That is why assholes break up with people by text. You never see the tears.
    Fortunately, some of us guys really are over 6 feet tall… like 4 inches over… HA! And some of us never wanted anything from you… well… other than someone to talk to and maybe a little tech support help now and then. So maybe there is a reason why I am on the top of that letter thing up there and… wait… why does it say goodbye??? Are you leaving me??? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…
    Just enjoy people while they are around and send your best when they leave. Don’t let it kill you. People are broken. People just want to feel needed. They don’t always care if the rest of us feel that way too.

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  14. Okay, that was really harsh and depressing wasn’t it? I didn’t mean for it to be. I don’t like mean people. I don’t like it when friends are hurting. But even if I could punch whoever this is in the nose for hurting you, it wouldn’t mend your heart. I’m not saying don’t let people into your life and your heart. Just let so many in that when some fall out you still have a heart full of love. That is the best way to get back at people who leave you… find more love in your heart… make more room… let more people in… drown out that stupid voice of sorrow and depression with a thousand laughing voices… a million… however many it takes.

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    • I love you (in a never met online kind of way). Arthur was one of my first boyfriends…he wrote ART LOVES ANG all over his jeans and sneakers. Anyway… the names are of people in my real life (truth), one in my online world, and two are just random made up names.

      I don’t trust easily so the people I let into my heart are people I truly feel I got to know. Some of them I had known for years. There really are people (hundreds) who will make you swoon and offer you the moon only to move on a week later… I don’t invest my heart in them, mainly because I am not the type of girl guys want to make swoon, but I am a good friend and have a great ear. Many times I have found that many of those people will stick around simply because they need someone to listen.

      As you know I am really emotional… and in real life I have the happy faucet turned on most of the time but when they see me lose it they don’t know how to handle it so it is easier not to handle it. Nobody wants to be put in a situation to watch someone break down crying… it isn’t comfortable.

      I promise I am not a sad married lady looking for an online relationship to solve all my woes. I love being married and want to be that couple who retires and travels the world together. I want to be like you and your wife. I have no need for someone to promise me the moon. However, if I make a connection with someone and we become friends – as in we talk everyday and we have each others back and only want good things for one another (and I have lots and lots of those kinds of friends) – then I literally mourn their disappearance as I would a real life loved one.

      So…. I always love that you take the time to comment… I think you really care and want me to be happy and that means a whole bunch. If you were to just disappear (aka stop commenting or acknowledging my visits to your blog) I would want to know why and if I emailed you to communicate and you ignored me I would forever wonder what I did. AND the fact I think you are a good guy and would never want to hurt me would make it even worse because YOU would know you were hurting me which means that you could care less how I feel.

      I know not everyone is going to like me… I am ok with that… It’s more about not knowing… UGHHHHHH

      Anyway…yea I really do think people suck sometimes when they knowingly put somebody else through pain because they can’t handle just communicating honestly that they just don’t want to know you anymore.

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  15. I totally get this! Life and people just suck!

    So since you and me are the same I hope neither will just disapear on the other. (Hugs) thanks once more for writing what I’m thinking!

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  16. This is hit home. I tried to get my feet wet in the world of online dating. I met a guy, we hung out several times…almost for three weeks. I thought it was going well then out of nowhere…I never from him again.

    I think some form of a goodbye would have been good for my sanity but the not knowing what went wrong is what is killing me.

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  17. I’m lucky, I guess – I’ve only had one person walk away without saying goodbye. And it totally sucked and I’m keen for it not to happen again.

    I tend to never leave people, or I’ll make it abundantly clear that the relationship has broken down, and I will act with boundaries so they get the hint.

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