EMBALMED WITH DESPAIR

It’s the kind of fog that stole my breath Thick and shadowy Dark skulking movements that stuck to my skin. Ominous and dangerous It held the memory of every broken scream I hated this kind of fog And for the longest time It’s the only kind I knew It swallowed the sun leaving me isolated,…

UNSETTLING

It’s a bit unsettling Knowing she’s still A part of me I know how strong And fierce she is Like a glowing ember She is fully awake Just waiting to burn This house I’ve built To protect myself From her brutality *I’d be foolish to believe I’ve beaten depression. She will always be waiting for…

FROZEN BREATH

The snow Dropped quietly Covering Everything Beautiful Majestic But… Someday She whispered Soft and quiet Like the snow Someday The cold will melt The wet will dry And my breath Will float away Without freezing Again… Someday It’s so hard being a mom. Or at least a mom who cares. My girl is nearly 15…

NOT EVERYONE IS HIM

Can inconsistency be a trauma? The way he said he loved me The way his eyes devoured me How his hands moved over me I remember feeling so high Destination cloud nine please He did everything right Made me lemon squares Opened my doors for me Dressed up to take me out “Let’s just drive…

CHEMICAL FEAR

They call it adrenaline But it’s just chemical fear I can taste it on my tongue Feel it speed through veins Like alcohol, thin and sharp It churns in my stomach Makes my nerves radiate And then… I’m a machine I’m not me… I’m a robot Something more innate Wakes up and steps up And…

LIKE TRINKETS

It’s known that hurting people hurt other people. Intentionally and unintentionally. Your traumas will always be a part of you but you get to decide how you carry them. Do you learn from them? Do you let them change you into a better more loving, compassionate, and giving person? Or do you carry them in…

ABSURD COBWEBS

  My thoughts, so many Hung like strings Dripping a quality I could not pinpoint I felt at this moment I must bear fully The abrupt pains They presented Like unwelcome visitors Of the utmost distinction Like fraying golden threads In a very important seam However, I couldn’t shake The scheming I felt Attached to…

THE MOLD MONSTER

I woke up after a long night of tossing and turning. Dreams of self-hate, disrespect, mistrust and betrayal. It felt… familiar. Like the beginning of something I still had control of. Once I woke I identified the core feelings I needed to work on. Now I’ll work through them and get a nap later. Depression…

NICE TRY MR. TUMOR

It was an early December morning and I was hungover. I had far too much to drink the night before for someone who hardly ever drank. I remember walking outside to cool off and sitting in the snow. It seemed a perfectly reasonable thing to do. Little did I know the next morning was going…

CRY INTO ME

I cry tears That never make it to the ground Into me they fell Weightless acidity They swallow my sensitivity Filling my insides to the brim They turn the air around me Breathless And absorb whatever time it is Magnifying my numerous regrets With clear and honest luminosity Heaving over sobs like a xylophone Accumulating…