Living is a choice Every single time And it’s been awhile Since I imagined death I wanted to know How the water would feel If I breathed it in I’ve heard it hurts But only for a moment And then I wondered If it would matter If it would hurt anyone And I couldn’t imagine…
The day absorbed me Painted me black Spit me out as smoke And watched As I tainted everything I touched Just soot and ash Worthless
It’s hard to explain The nature of things That are invisible Science tries to With measurements With observations Sampling reality By constricting By eliminating Trying to find The reason The basis The foundation That makes An invisible thing True or false But sometimes The invisible thing Is just invisible It doesn’t exist In the place…
It’s a fight. Sometimes I freeze Watch the storm come Glued to my spot I know what it brings I know it’s bigger I know it’s stronger I know it’s dark And menacing And that I should run I know too It was inevitable That it would Come back for me And yet I’m frozen…
I found calm Steady breath A place where The quiet feels… Composed But what if I’m in the eye Of the storm? What if chaos Has just settled Like sand does Waiting for the heat To clash with the cold Inside my brain What if his screams What if his anger What if their words…
You know that place where The nights fall And the days get buried The place where Rivers run Rainbows fade And breezes fall silent That’s the place I need to find So I can rest Far away From this place
It doesn’t matter It doesn’t compute It doesn’t work It doesn’t want to keep Fighting the same fight Listening to the same lies It doesn’t want to exist In this one moment It doesn’t want to think It doesn’t want to work It doesn’t want to be
So many colors Melt into my eyes Absorbing the light And transforming it Distorting it Then transporting it Into bundles Small and nondescript Barely noticeable Into the universe Of black and white
I forget how depression feels sometimes. That’s dangerous. To forget isn’t an option. I have to remind myself how sneaky and insidious it is. I must remember what it felt like to be its prisoner. Depression as a room and me held captive against my will. I am so grateful to have escaped this room……
I wish we didn’t need sleep but we do. I’m starting to feel age creeping into my bones and my brain and now more than ever I’m realizing how important a clear and stable mind sleep is. Brittle bones Trapped In a bag of flesh Fat dissolving Organs hardening Brain short Short Short-circuiting Life deteriorating…
