PRETTY COMPASSIONATE

/ February 25, 2015

I am constantly in awe of Lizzi Rogers.  She pours words out so eloquently and seemingly effortlessly. Say that five times really fast!

Her words are never just words; they live, breathe, and jump up and touch you wherever you are reading them.  I needed a post for today because another one fell through and she quite magically produced these lines out of thin air. These deeply powerful words wrapped around my mind and are still tangled up inside my mind as I hit publish this morning.

Thank you Lizzi, as always, for being my heart and my strength.

 

 

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PRETTY COMPASSIONATE by Lizzi Rogers

“You will be pretty intelligent, pretty creative, pretty amazing, But you will NEVER be merely ‘pretty’.” – Katie Makkai

When I was just a little girl, I asked MY mother
What lies ahead? Will I be pretty?
Am I pretty now?
Here’s what my mother said…

She paused

And then told me “You’re striking”,
Her hesitation dashing every hope
Confirming my fears that ‘pretty’
Had already been struck out by my genes.
It doesn’t matter though,
Because every “I love you”
Goes some way
To mitigating the disappointment.
Doesn’t it?

Because to ignore the aesthetics is noble
To love the person in spite of their looks
To find good within the ugly and lumpen
Is that not what evolution is all about?
Feminism? Humanism?
The choice to acknowledge inner beauty
And publicly abhor those who try too hard?

Fie on models and catwalk determinants!
Fie on brainwashing and lack of education!
Fie on advertising and sheep-mindedness!
Fie on diets and desperation and poor role-models!
Fie on the history that pretty is good and ugly is bad!
Fie on the inheritance of differentiation!
Fie on stereotypes and
Fie on US

For appeasing our nature;
For aesthetics are purposeful
The visual is powerful
Geared for survival
By choosing the strongest
The healthiest
The prettiest:
The person whose genes
Recombined will be best – it’s
Acknowledged biology,
Quite simply put.

And yet it made monsters
Divisive among us
Told us “Envy is bad
And compassion is good”
So we sit and talk up
All the beautiful minds
Not figure, but CHARACTER
Should be what we find
The most beauteous of all
And the thing that we tout
In ourselves, as the feature
We’re proudest about…
…whilst we’re shopping to flatter
The best of our shape
Some mascara,
Concealer
SMALL things, just to make
Ourselves slightly (not too much
‘Cause that would be wrong
For the sake of the children,
We won’t be full-on
But we’d like, if we’re honest,
To know that we TRIED
Or look like we could,
If we wanted, take pride
In the way we appear)
Improved and enhanced
We’ll stop short of surgery
We’re mindful; balanced
We’re not like those OTHERS
Who give in to the beast
That spectre of envy, which whispers
“You’re least.
You’re ugly
Misshapen
And ten kinds of wrong
Who will want to go near you
Or let you belong?
You’re forsure a ten-pinter
So quick, get it fixed”
And the sneers and cold shoulders
Will surely be nixed
When you’re gorgeous;
They’ll jealously
Flock ‘round to see
To bathe in your radiance
The brand-new Queen Bee
Who can rule from her throne
With a pout of her lips
A down-tilt of her perfect-lashed eyes
Leaves a mix of the bitter
And insecure beings who burn
Just for once,
Let the light be right
Will I get my turn
As the one to be
PRETTY?
The one centre-stage?
Each mirror will answer
And leave them enraged
Endowed with the knowledge
We wish wasn’t true:
We’ll fore’er come off worse
In ‘Who’s prettier than who?’
So we MUST have compassion
On those who succeed
Or who strive for good looks
Who somehow feel the need
To show off their faces and figures
And such; to demonstrate once
And for all that they’re much
Much, much more worthy,
Admirable, loved and acclaimed
After all, just admit it
We’re all in the game
Of skin-deep validation
It’s the way of the world
We all want to be beautiful
Pretty
Beheld.

lizzi

 

Lizzi is a Deep Thinker, Truth-Teller and seeker of Good Things. She’s also silly, irreverent and tries to write as beautifully as possible.

She’s living Life in Silver Linings and *twinklysparklygoodness* because two miscarriages and a subsequent diagnosis of spousal infertility will rather upset anyone’s applecart. She borrows other people’s children to love in the meantime.

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62 thoughts on “PRETTY COMPASSIONATE”

    • I know, cherie, and I’ve been there too. It’s unpleasant. I hope you get back to being gorgeous soon *hugs*

      And thanks. A thing happened and I was a bit repulsed and then a lot upset and then a bit real.

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  10. You and I have discussed this in the past so there’s no need to do so again. I will say, however, that as an architect of words, you are an effin’ master. That can never be said enough.

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    • I know, I know, and what you say stands, but…FEELINGS…even if they’re lies. I got caught. Only briefly though, and Sunset got me back out pretty quickly. She is a beautiful soul and she HELPED.

      And thank you, sir, very much indeed 🙂

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  11. Love this Lizzi. 🙂 Thanks for letting her come over to play Hasty. Also. I now have the sudden urge to make “fie” a part of my everyday vocabulary.

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  13. I love this… maybe men will read it and realize how much pressure life puts on women… and it is all made-up societal pressure bullshit… you are all beautiful… and I am not just trying to lure people to my blog, but I just did a post about women and beauty, and it might be slightly important… I have no way of knowing… but it has a really long title and I did it a few days ago… But this was a great post.

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  16. You are amazing, you know that right? Hasty put if perfectly, your words are magical and they DO live and breathe and jump up at me when I’m reading them. But your mind? That is the crown jewel. I’m going to read this to my daughter (my older one) she and I have had many discussions about this. And you will earn major cool points with her 🙂

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    • Awwwh thanks so much, G! That means a lot. And it more means a HUGE lot that you’re going to take this into Real and let it make (maybe) a difference or an impact, or at the very least a point of discussion with your daughter. Make sure you watch Katie Makkai’s video with her, too…it’s stunning.

      Thank you ❤

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        • It wasn’t like that…it was more self-reflective. A situation happened where a load of women who I’m CONVINCED would otherwise be all “Oh, we don’t need to bow to that beauty crap” were suddenly scrambling over themselves to be ‘MILFed’ by one of the others. It confused me and unnerved me and also made me a bit sad cos I know it wouldn’t work on me (for several reasons) and ALSO I was annoyed in a way that I even wanted it.

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